On the face of it this is a boring story about some soap…but it really highlights the impact aphasia can have on something that is otherwise just a mundane, everyday task.
About a month ago my darling husband was refilling our soap dispensers. I handed him another empty dispenser and asked him to fill it so I had hand soap for the kitchen too. This prompted an entire conversation, including a fabulous demonstration by yours truly, of why I wanted hand soap in the kitchen.
A day or so later he had moved the soap onto my desk in front of the computer. I couldn’t quite fathom why he would have put it there and so this sparks our second, very long, conversation about the kitchen soap. At this point he tells me it’s washing up liquid and that’s what I had asked for. Now, even if I had asked for a second dispenser of washing up liquid I still can’t work out why it ended up by the computer. I don’t think I’ll ever find out either!
So after all this we come to an understanding that the dispenser is for hand soap and belongs by the sink. I’m under the impression that he was to pour the contents back into their original container and replace with the soap. Fabulous, all sorted. Or so I thought.
Skip forward to yesterday. My hands have been cracking so I thought I’d double check that what I’ve been using was the hand soap. When I ask the question I was hit with the same confused look as a month ago and I’m told he hasn’t touched it. So we end up sniffing the soap, the washing up liquid and the mystery substance several times before deciding on a balance of probabilities that it is in fact hand soap.
Today, I come upstairs and the kitchen soap is now in the bathroom. Now I’m really confused. Upon questioning (think police interrogation at this point), he tells me he thought it was hand soap. OK, yep, with you so far, but there already is a dispenser in the bathroom and that one is for the kitchen, as it had been for weeks. So why therefore is it now in the bathroom? So we have yet another discussion (I’ve lost count by now) about how the soap is for the kitchen sink so when I wash my hands to cook I can do it with soap and not washing up liquid. And yes, I am too lazy to walk to the downstairs toilet and wash my hands there. He then accidentally tells me he doesn’t wash his hands to cook (he doesn’t mean this…at least I hope he doesn’t!). This time we can barely speak through laughter at just how ridiculous this has gotten all over some soap.
Now I think I’ve finally gotten through to him that the soap belongs in the kitchen. He goes to take it back downstairs along with the bathroom soap dispenser. Picture me confused again. It transpires that earlier on, he had taken the bathroom dispenser downstairs to refill but decided that instead he would bring the kitchen soap up so as not to waste it. I truly don’t think I’ll ever understand the way his brain works (and this isn’t a stroke thing- he’s always done odd stuff 🙈). Probably going to find the soap in the car next time…